OK, where is everyone? Would it be too presumptuous to say you were waiting for me?

Or maybe y'all wore yourselves out? I'm still ready to go!

Good morning Brad, I'm here but it's going to be a long work day with much to do.

This could be a "don't go blind day?"

(Message edited by bonaire9 on May 22, 2008)

Hi Jerry, yeah I should catch up a bit too, especially with the long weekend coming up.

This could be one of those days, depending on how you take the question.

Morning Brad and Jerry, and all BT'ers to come
Jerry, I knew that would happen if you kept playing with your monkey

Is not Thursday suppose to be funnies day, now that Jerry is on the other side discipline has gone to he11. To get back on track.

Lost Kitty

Cecil, like I said yesterday, only in So Cal.

Here Kitty, kitty!

BH, Patrick, WAKE UP!

This is only kind-of funny but also wicked ironic. It reminds me of the software company that offered $20,000 to the first person to break their encryption code. It took something like 22 seconds after the code was released till it was broken. It just does not seem like a good idea to challenge a thief.

thats so funny Cecil

I've been up since 4am. Leave me a lone. This day is my star day, as in getting in trouble day.................

As long as we're posting pictures. . . .

Patrick, are you a Gemini? I am, and I'm supposed to get into trouble today, too.

No, water baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cecil, thanks for kicking off the funnies...funny enough, I had nothing that I could post and maintain my slap-free existence.

Patrick, remember your lithium.

Patrick's a battery?????

Linda, LMAO Love it!!!

Morning boys and girls. I have NOTHING fam friendly so, I'm with Brad, I not wanna get slapped either.

OK don't have a joke but have a few pics..

Sorry couldn't delete it - had to ammend my duplicate post. I think Kimo Wassabbe sent over margaritas.

(Message edited by mara2196 on May 22, 2008)

Morning all, It's getting ready to rain here for the next several days, just in time for the holiday weekend. I'm picking up floaties from around the pool and I need help.. We have a couple of those mesh and wire loungers that are suppose to twist back up into a circle and fit in this little mesh bag.. well, it ain't happening. I have twisted every which way and I can't get them back into the bag..

I miss Bob!

Maybe you need a bigger bag, Jim.

This is not funny but very important as we approach Memorial Day.

YoMo......LOL

Kimo, twisting and shouting....I wanna see that LOL! Those things are a pain though so we'll go easy on ya.

Jim/Kimo.....OMG I have a dear friend in Arlington How cool is that? Th Muzzy's? He works for DFW Airport. I know it's a big town but thought it cool ya lived there too.

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.

MARRIAGE SEMINAR

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes.'
He addressed the man,
'Can you name your wife's favorite flower?'
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, 'It's Pillsbury, isn't it?

CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store
to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco
and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo -ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.
(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)

WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'

Patrick!!!!! OMG, those are great LMAO.....

I've been wondering why I feel so tired. I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax build-up, poor blood or anything else I could think of. But now I found
out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked.



Here's why:. . .



The population of this country is 273 million. 140 million are retired.
That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school.
Which leaves 48 million to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government.
Leaving 19 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Bin-Laden.
Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.
Take from that total the 14.8 million people who work for state and city governments.
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.
Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.
You and me.
And there you are sitting on your a$$ , at your desk, reading jokes.


Nice. Real nice

That was good Patrick..

Professional Test

So you think you're a professional.... (anything). Try this quiz to check your qualifications. The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and will tell you whether you are qualified to be a "professional."

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

3. The Lion King is hosting an Animal Conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?

Be back shortly with the answers

Since your friend works at the airport, can you ask him/her to run by the AA terminal and tell the pilots to get back to work.. They are getting ready to jack up my trip..

That was a good one Patrick I guess I better get to work.....seriously!!!

Hi BH....I think I'm not professional at all.....LOL!
I've seen those before but.....is it too early for Crown and Seven?

AA = now charging $15.00 for the first bag !

or at least tell them to wait to go on strike until I get to Bonaire.. that would be fine

I'll call and ask him right now Not sure his capacity at DFW but he does well working there. I'm best buds with his wife.
AA's gonna bend everyone over eventually.
We just got home from BON and are plugging numbers and trying to figure the best route to get back there this year.

Anymore it's not overly fun to get to Bonaire and that just s*cks.

Yeh Timmmy, I heard that this morning too.. That's okay.. I'm putting 2 complete sets of dive gear in that first bag..

BlueHarley, 1) you open the door and put giraffe. 2) you open the door, take the giraffe out and put the elephant in. 3) The elephant, he is in the fridge. 4) in a boat..

Jim is good ya'll...3 out of 4

1. The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator put in the giraffe and close the door. (This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.)

2.Open the refrigerator put in the elephant and close the refrigerator. Wrong Answer! Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. (This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.)

3.Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. (This tests your memory.)

4.Correct Answer: You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Conference. (This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.)

D*m Kimo Wassabi....you're good. It's lunch time here so it's time for a Crown LOL!

I flunked and am NOT professional I'm honest though!

That's about right.. I never learn from my mistakes.. Kobi, have one for me... or two

Mo, did you get all your studying done last night

Hi Guys and Gals!

Timmmy, I heard of AA charging more this morning too. Hey, what else are they gonna do? Gas prices are so high, I am just glad they are still flying as other airlines are charging more for luggage too, I am sure all will follow or go under by the huge increase in gas. I am not happy about it either, but they got to pay the increased gas prices too and for an airline, that is sure a huge albatross right now for all of them. I wish the price of that barrel would start to go down so everyone could at least be able to afford to drive to work and maybe a vacation here or there. It is getting scary with those increased gas prices, I tell ya, very scary, I hope the airlines can make it through it all. Lots of talk of cutting back on flights too going on to save $$ due to increased gas prices, real shame what is going on for all of us as it sure is starting to have a jelly roll effect on us all, not to mention the increased prices on food too, all due to gas prices!

no flick-ability today...still thinkin' about ya BBZ

I have extra gas to spare, if it will help

That was funny

Please go to part 2


(Message edited by modjerry on May 22, 2008)